I started this blog with the hopes that I would write more. And I didn't hold any specific expecations as to how often I would write. Of course daily would be grand, but I didn't pressure myself. I wanted to create a beautiful world of words that would inspire, words that would motivate, words that would pull me out of my funk & see beauty in each of them. It was working for a while, but at the moment, I'm lacking in beautiful words. I want nothing more than to go back in time; to find that rewind button & go back & know what to do to make things different.
I can't do that, but I really want to.
Now, I'm filled with endless & unanswerable questions that have taken up residence in my every thought. I know it's a process, but it's a painful process and there's no way to tell when the ache in my heart will minimize.
It probably is a good idea to write through this though. Life isn't always beautiful & perfect or filled with happy rainbow colored butterflies floating around every thought. There is a lot of ugliness too, and that ugliness is a part of life that, unfortunately, can't be ignored. Emotions are emotions, and they're real, regardless of their pretiness, or lack of.