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Showing posts from 2011

solo

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it seems fitting that i should be hit with a stomach bug over New Years, thus being forced to stay in. It will be the first New Year's Eve I have spent completely alone, and in all honesty, I'm not all that sad about it. The more I think about it, the more perfect it seems. I have much purging to do and I have to take this time to clear my head and focus on what I want to accomplish in the coming year, what I need to do in order to succeed in all my goals. Besides that, in my continual analyzing, it seems like a contradiction to the whole "start the year fresh" idea to go out and drink all night, staying up late only to wake up in the morning starting the new year off hungover. It seems to me that it would make more sense to spend the evening centering the self so that one can wake up feeling refreshed and focused. On that note...welcome 2012! Consider me centered!

gremlins

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they come in many shapes and sizes. the little voice that you can barely hear sometimes, but you know it's there, and it still packs quite a punch. nagging at you, whispering ever so softly all manner of things to try to sabotage all the positivity that you're holding onto. sometimes they're bold and flamboyant, pulling out all the stops to attempt to be the primary influence in your thinking and decision making. they want to hold you down. however, gremlins are just fears. that's all. they're a part of you, just like the sunlit, cheerful and encouraging thoughts, gremlins have their place too. and truth be told, they aren't your enemy. they are actually the perfect motivation to push you to accomplish your goals. take them to heart, listen to them, acknowledge them, and then tell them, politely, to go pound sand :) because you know, deep down inside, that while there are all sorts of notions that can come to light, there is only one way to go in life. forward.

where have i been?

it's been over six months since i've updated this poor, lonely blog, yet i've had it in my thoughts most of the time. i love to write. i love to put words to life. i have an increasing need to get my shit out in one way or another, but life doesn't always allow me the opportunity. either way, i could go on and on about how busy i am right now, how busy i have been the past few months, the past many months, but it all boils down to the fact that i've come to many a conclusions where my life is concerned i'm tired of my day job. i'm tired of my commute. i have no desire to sit behind a desk anymore. i don't want to be a part of something that brings me misery anymore. i want to do what brings me happiness. i want to show my children that they can find happiness within themselves and move in life in a way that they choose. i want them to see me do what brings me fulfillment. i want them to know that whatever they want to do they can achieve. i want to do wh
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I have many creative outlets. And there are different times in my life that I seem to hone in more on one over the other. And it's obvious I've neglected this outlet for a little while. The sun is out, however, and spring is here, and the dreary winter days are being pushed away by the blooming beauty all around. Perhaps more reflection will come soon.