As the year begins its' journey into becoming the past, I am beginning my own journey, as I always do at this time, further into myself. The autumn always greets me with an invitation to dive deeper into the metaphorical waters to continue the search for more.
To search for more. Because there is always more.
To look at where I need to make changes. Because there is always room for improvement.
To hold space for what the year has given me. Because there are always gifts, even in a year that has held many challenges and grief-stricken moments for many people. My 2016 was 2009, but as an empath I feel it all anyway, so there are always moments of holding space for others in my life.
It's not the prospect of a new year, in and of itself, that creates this force in me. While I do enjoy the idea of a clear, blank page in front of me, it's the whole season itself. The darkness outside that invites me into my own darkness inside. The opportunity to confront myself. The quietness beckons me deeper to the places I tend to avoid during seasons of abundant light. And there is nothing to fear in those shadows.
On the contrary, I feel like it's all in the shadows. All of it. Everything we miss or are unable to see through the reflections, or from the brightness that blinds us from what is right there, in front of us. When you turn that light away and start walking into the darkness, your eyes eventually adjust and begin to focus, and with a different perspective.
When the new year rings in this time, I'm planning to take a break from facebook and will be deactivating my account for a while. While I've had ideas of making a year out of it, I'm going to be realistic in that I may change my mind at some point, for a moment, or altogether. But I'm starting out and running for at least a month, as an experiment of sorts. And this blog, this space here, will be my home. I'm finding that my own words are being drowned out by the constant clutter of a newsfeed that really doesn't feed me in nourishing ways. Seems to be a good next step in the natural progression of my journey. I hope you will accompany me at least occasionally.